26 Jan Productive is Positive
PRODUCTIVE IS POSITIVE
We’ve all heard that we should be positive. Being positive has lots of benefits because it raises our vibration. The energy we give out, tends to be the energy we get back. So, it makes sense that choosing positive thoughts, words and actions are going to be helpful on many levels. However, what do we do when we’re in the middle of a challenge and being positive feels impossible?
Trying to be positive when we’re feeling the opposite can cause more stress and make us feel even worse. A simple shift that’s helped me is to switch the word POSITIVE TO PRODUCTIVE or SUPPORTIVE. It’s ok that we feel sad, angry or frustrated at times, but when we dwell in negativity and behave negatively…it’s not productive and it causes us more stress. A great example of this happened yesterday. My six-year old son had a homework sheet to do. He got angry because he had to wait a while until I could help him. He acted out in anger and scribbled (thankfully in pencil) all over his homework. I explained to him that it’s ok to be angry, but now he has the added work of erasing all the scribble. We talked about some “productive” things he could do when he’s feeling angry like practicing his karate moves on the punching bag in the basement.
When you notice yourself thinking a negative thought, telling a negative story or about to take an action that may cause more stress…ask yourself, “Is this productive?” If it’s not, ask yourself, “What would be a productive and supportive use of my thoughts, words and actions right now?”
Here are some examples from my own life that maybe you can relate to:
1. Repeatedly thinking and saying, “I’m totally exhausted!”
This may be true, but it’s not productive or helpful. Instead, I acknowledge that I’m tired, and choose to do something that’s going to be rejuvenating and restorative as soon as I can.
2. Supporting someone who is upset.
It can be hard to remain positive when those around us are feeling sad, angry or upset. When I notice my vibration going down, I breathe and ask myself what would be productive? This frees me up to stay grounded in my own feelings which is more helpful for everyone. Then I can decide the best way to hold a loving space for someone.
3. Losing a loved one.
Losing a loved one is probably the most heartbreaking thing a human being can experience. During the grieving process, feeling positive was not anywhere in reach for me. However, over and over I asked myself, “What would be supportive right now?” Sometimes the answer was allowing myself to cry and be alone. Sometimes it was taking a walk. Sometimes it was reaching out to a trusted friend. The act of being present and taking care of myself helped me take one breath and one step at a time without causing myself more stress.
4. The physical pain of an injury or sickness.
I think we can all understand that being sick or in pain makes it hard to be positive. However, I’ve experienced first-hand that a negative attitude of anger, blame, guilt or fear just exacerbates the situation. Hence, it’s counterproductive. I acknowledge the pain and then ask, “What would be productive, supportive and healing?” Honoring my needs feels soothing, and energetically it’s more conducive to getting better.
When you shift your intention from trying to be positive to asking what would be productive…you are taking unnecessary pressure off yourself and empowering yourself to make conscious, supportive choices. The amazing thing is, a productive choice is always going to make a positive shift!